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A painful but needed lesson about "helping" others
A man once found a cocoon and placed it on his desk to watch the butterfly emerge. After a while, he could see the butterfly making a hole in the side of the cocoon but then, the butterfly stopped before it could make the hole large enough to climb through.
The man waited for a while bt nothing more happened so he decided to "help" the butterfly by opening the hole himself.
The butterfly emerged, but it's body was swollen and its wings shriveled and malformed. He kept the butterfly for long time, but it never became healthy.
He learned later that he had actually done this to the butterfly himself. In making the cocoon, nature has designed it so that the effort of breaking out of the cocoon was what was needed to pump fluids into the butterflies wings and because it never got the chance to do this, it remained incomplete and improperly grown.
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I have always liked to "help" people. When I see that others are having a hard time or finding something difficult, I naturally tend to jump in and "help" them because I felt it my duty to "lend a hand" and "chip in".
And I have often wondered why, later on, my efforts are not appreciated or even despised by those I "helped".
It is because I have taken away their chance to learn how to do it themselves and make themselves stronger in the process.
Things are not always as they seem, my friends, and it has taken 50 years for this lesson to finally sink in and make sense to me. It has been a very painful lesson and I wish that you can benefit from my mistake.
I urge you to consider carefully next time you are tempted to "help" someone. If it is assisting them in some way that does NOT cripple them or take away that God-given opportunity to grow and evolve and become stronger, then it is probably ok, but if it DOES, then think carefully, because you may just end up doing exactly the opposite of what you set out to do - even with the most loving intentions.
I apologise and ask God's forgiveness for all the hurtful "assistance" I have inflicted on others.
The man waited for a while bt nothing more happened so he decided to "help" the butterfly by opening the hole himself.
The butterfly emerged, but it's body was swollen and its wings shriveled and malformed. He kept the butterfly for long time, but it never became healthy.
He learned later that he had actually done this to the butterfly himself. In making the cocoon, nature has designed it so that the effort of breaking out of the cocoon was what was needed to pump fluids into the butterflies wings and because it never got the chance to do this, it remained incomplete and improperly grown.
____________________________________________________________
I have always liked to "help" people. When I see that others are having a hard time or finding something difficult, I naturally tend to jump in and "help" them because I felt it my duty to "lend a hand" and "chip in".
And I have often wondered why, later on, my efforts are not appreciated or even despised by those I "helped".
It is because I have taken away their chance to learn how to do it themselves and make themselves stronger in the process.
Things are not always as they seem, my friends, and it has taken 50 years for this lesson to finally sink in and make sense to me. It has been a very painful lesson and I wish that you can benefit from my mistake.
I urge you to consider carefully next time you are tempted to "help" someone. If it is assisting them in some way that does NOT cripple them or take away that God-given opportunity to grow and evolve and become stronger, then it is probably ok, but if it DOES, then think carefully, because you may just end up doing exactly the opposite of what you set out to do - even with the most loving intentions.
I apologise and ask God's forgiveness for all the hurtful "assistance" I have inflicted on others.
Comment
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Comment by William Kimmel on January 12, 2010 at 9:30pm
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Good wisdom in this statement. Very appropriate. =)
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Comment by Leonard L. Brunk aka Oldman on January 12, 2010 at 5:13pm -
Part of growing is to learn from our mistakes nomatter how painful they are. I have made a few myself ; But endure the sadness in order to teach my children not to do the same .
Oldman
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Comment by Linda on January 12, 2010 at 4:52pm -
Well said ... thanks for sharing, very profound.... I to have learned these lessons, (well I hope) ... There is most deffinately a difference in "Being of Service" as Dr Wayne Dyer suggest, and jumping into a situation with the intention that I know better for you, what is good for you .... Namaste Walk in Peace
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Comment by Espen on January 12, 2010 at 4:44pm -
So true, that's all I can say. Struggle can be a blessing.
© 2012 Created by Espen.
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